Posts tagged with feats

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July 22, 2010

A Test of Controlling Your Emotions

Awhile back I wrote about how to stop being reactive. For this blog post, I’d like to expand on that idea a little bit more.

Emotions are extremely difficult to control. The reason for this is that they’ve been driving our actions since we were born. If we felt like having ice cream, we’d ask for it, or if we were in the mood for a new shirt, we’d go buy it.

If I didn’t feel like writing today, I probably wouldn’t have written this blog post. This alone is more than enough proof.

The way I see it, most of us are slaves to our emotions. Now that’s not a bad thing. By all means, if it feels good to give way to your feelings, feel free to do so. As you can tell, we’ve been doing that for a while.

Unfortunately, we’ve been so accustomed to letting our emotions run free that we forget to place restrictions on them. For instance, sometimes people will intentionally bait you into getting angry just so they can see you lose control. This is similar in the way that we incite others to laughter by doing something comical or telling a funny joke.

Either way, this ends up making us do things we never intended, saying hurtful things we don’t mean or getting riled up over issues that don’t really matter. When that happens, it’s really just an effect of acting on our emotions with abandon for so long.

It is for this reason that a very small number of people can effectively control their emotions. Public speakers and lawyers are just some of those that have to be able to master this technique — the high-stress situations they work under call for it. For regular people like us, however, we don’t have on-the-job training to force us to command our feelings so easily.

But that’s why you have me.

See every opportunity for an outburst as a test

Over time, I’ve come to realize that we have a choice in the way we go about our actions. That’s why these days I view opportunities to lose my temper as tests. When someone tries to bait me into getting a certain response, I just imagine a mental scorecard in my head presenting me with two options, yes or no.

Yes as in “Yes, I’ll lose my temper this time”, or no as in “Not going to overreact this time”.

This is just what I do, but the main thing I want you to take away from this is that we always have a choice in whether to unleash fury on someone else or keep ourselves in check. It just takes practice to be able to do this every situation — no matter how emotionally taxing.

Think happy thoughts (seriously it works)

Though our feelings do have considerable power over us, it’s not impossible to suppress them. Some people may choose to say comforting phrases over and over or some might resort to purchasing a cheap stress ball, but what I find works for me is just thinking happy thoughts.

Are you in a heated argument? Practice the power of conjuring up amusing memories and kiss your temper good-bye. Taking yourself out of a stressful situation and into a calming one does wonders for ones self-control.

Now this technique is also very tricky (like I’ve said, it’s not easy). I recommend just stopping yourself for a minute and looking at the situation from an impartial point of view. Then all that’s left to do is think about how funny it’ll be when you’re 3 days into the future. You’ll have lost interest by then. Funny, right?

Well, when you’re in the moment it won’t always be. Sometimes you’ll just be seething with anger, ready to throw a punch if anyone gets even an inch within pushing your buttons. And yes, it happens. People will push your buttons and expect you to react accordingly.

But that’s the beauty of being human. We don’t have to react the same way to the same situations. Upon repeated exposure, we automatically build up resistance. Once we get used to these situations (in which people keep pushing the same buttons) we end up not caring.

I still recommend mastering the art of self-control. It’s a skill not many can learn — it’s easy to get used to things, but it’s much harder to change yourself.
Creative Commons License photo credit: Victor Bezrukov

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July 19, 2010

Be More Than the Average Person

The ones who do more than the average get extremely good results.

The man who works hard every single day gets the most compensation for his efforts, while the guy who works strictly on weekdays receives his standard pay.

The girl who dances without limits, who tries her very hardest, and instills passion in every twirl, jump, and hip movement will become a master of the dancing arts yet, while the competition practices at set times throughout the week, never straying from their schedules.

In our society, there are only people who do the standard affair and people who do much more than is necessary.

Generally, people aren’t comfortable being or doing more than they are. They will do as much as they can to keep from looking awkward, or weird, or self conscious. In the process, they end up looking like all of these things anyway.

Very few people are bold enough to be themselves. Those who are will do as they please, whistle as they walk, and throw paint on the bland and the dull to make it into art just because they feel like it.

As a result, these people are looked down upon. And it’s right that they should be, correct? I mean, how can they act so out of the ordinary and expect to be treated like everyone else?

And that’s just it. They don’t.

To be treated like everyone else is to be treated like jut another person. Just another worker bee. Another cog in society going where everybody else goes. This is why the bold decide to be different.

Because when at first they are ostracized, in time someone will say:

“Whatever you’re doing… that’s neat!”

And then another one will say that and then another. And another. And then, like magic, a movement is born and the one who is bold becomes the leader put in the front of it.

Why do you think the ones going against the norms are singled out? Why do you think they have an easier (or should I say, more fun) time getting to where they want to be?

Why do you think the ones who are different get extremely good results?

Because it makes them indispensable.

The world has enough people running around who are exact clones of one another. Those who have the guts to stand out and be different already realize this. And, inherently, the rest of us know it as well.

No one is born restricted

As children we are free to deem the world our oyster. But over time, we are given rules (through parental guidance or school training) that force us to obey. We are given orders to sit still and pay attention. Be quiet and draw within the lines.

Use the right colors for the right picture.

So as these rules are applied to the actions we do and to the way we live our lives everyday. Eventually it becomes a habit. And in the end, it becomes who we are.

But the few that break through this programming are the “glitches”. The individuals with a spirit that standardizing rules and behavior-management laws can’t control. These people are more than the average person.

How to be more

You too can be more than the average person. You don’t have to be another worker destined for corporate ladder climbership. You can create your own separate identity… an identity far more valuable than you ever imagined.

This is what you have to do.

1. Encourage breaks in perspective

Your perspective is your reality. When you see something happen that you never thought was ever possible, this is called a break in perspective. Find as many of these as you can. If you think you can’t do something because it seems way too out of the ordinary, assume you’re probably wrong. I would’ve never guessed that a mere child (Justin Bieber) would be the focus of the most popular video on a social networking site — and he’s not even that great of a singer. But what makes him stand out is that he’s different: he’s a child with a half-way decent voice discovered by Usher.

Look for the weird feats, believe in bold accomplishments, and aspire one in a million chances. You just might be able to pull one off.

2. Read the biographies of the indispensable

Do you think that you’re the only one pushing to be unique in a world of conformity? Countless others just like you are struggling to make the world their own. And through these struggles come amazing feats — the impact of which you should be taking advantage of.

With the “safety” of a consistent paycheck calling to you, it can be difficult to choose a path less beaten and control your own life. Fortunately, there are individuals who have already attained what you seek – a life that’s better than average – and you can use their accomplishments to fuel your desire.

3. Act with your own incentives

Average people have the typical incentives – marry so they can have kids, have kids because it seems like the next step, get a job so they can make money. Incentives that are taken up for little personal reason aren’t worth shooting for. Aim for incentives that are all your own and greatly improve your enjoyment of life.

Do you think the artist paints because art sells? No, he paints because he loves to do it. The extraordinary dancer dances because it’s her passion. From embracing what you enjoy, you gain personal fulfillment and acceptance.

So don’t be one who goes with the flow. Get a job that you love. Live a life that you’ll love. Take on challenges that inspire you to have them bested.

Act with your own incentive.

4. Infuse quality with time

There is no such thing as “closing time” on a mind motivated above the average. Even more so, there is also no such thing as working 9 -5 or any sort of set time line. If the work you get enjoyment from requires you to do a project that will take most of the day to complete, you wouldn’t complain. Because it’s your work.

You can never work too much or toil too little, as long as every minute is dedicated to quality. Long ago, time was perceived to be valuable. Farmers took great care in making the most delicious crops around. Owners took great pains to see their customers smile.

Now, we are in a time where quality is sacrificed for the sake of speed and efficiency. Just getting a product out matters more than creating quality. The average person values time over quality. The above average person values both.

The average person wastes time doing needless tasks. The above average person invests time in quality, understanding that value takes time to make.

You don’t have to be average

This took me a while to realize, being swamped underneath the delusion of “saving time” and “making deadlines”. While these things are vital tools in motivating you to do great work, never sacrifice yourself or your uniqueness just to get by and get things done. Chances are you’ve been “just getting by” your entire life. Doing just enough to pass on to the next stage.

Forget the next stage and forget about passing on. I used to always tell myself, “I can’t wait until this tedious period in my life is over, then I can do what I want”. Foolish words I know them now to be. If you can’t control your life now, then you’ll never be able to. This is something the average person already knows, but refuses to accept.

Until the day they die, they will live under the heel of someone else’s paycheck, most likely that of their boss. And when their social security checks come in, whether they’re currently working or not at the ripe, old, go-crazy-with-your-money age of 65, then they will know:

To live as average is to live a life controlled by others. You have to be more to be free.

Creative Commons License photo credit: Llima

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July 15, 2010

Creating Your First Product (Part 1)

The feeling you get when working towards an end is the best feeling in the world.

I remember when I first came to college. For years it had been my sole purpose to get accepted into a top institution. All the years poured into mindless education had finally paid off when I got accepted into the University of Chicago. I was at a loss for words. But soon I myself would feel lost as well.

Having lived out my purpose, I felt like there wasn’t much left to do but wander aimlessly for a few months, going to parties, cutting back on classwork, but mostly just seeing how everybody was going about their college careers.

To my surprise, a lot of my housemates where majoring in the sciences. I thought maybe this meant something. I originally had come to become a doctor. Maybe this was where I belonged.

Unfortunately, my grades didn’t reflect this. And in reality, I wasn’t all that astonished. The work was just too difficult. It seemed that all we were learning were pointless theoretical concepts. Concepts that I couldn’t be less motivated to understand.

This wasn’t what I wanted to do. In truth, I aspired to be a businessman. And not the type that merely sold things for the sake of money, but sold inspiration.

Realizing this, I went online and looked for inspiration. There, I learned of people I came to idolize: Steve Pavlina, Jonathan Mead, Tim Ferriss. It didn’t take much to figure out what they all had in common; they were writers.

My true calling

I found a new purpose and discovered my passion: writing. Writing to inspire others.

It’s been over a year since then, with many bumps crossed, lots of confusion clarified, and focuses regained. I’m now living my passion.

With my third year far into the future, I’m happy to be able to focus more directly on improving my writing and my relationships with other bloggers seeking to make a difference.

What’s more, I’ve finally the time to work on shipping an actual product. In the coming weeks, I’ll be releasing a very short (maybe 15 pages or so), free e-book. This will be nothing too major, since this is just my first foray into product creation and design.

I’ve read countless e-books, devoured advice from other bloggers, and learned about all the possible outcomes. Worst case scenario, no one downloads the e-book, though my aim is to get over a hundred downloads.

Creating your first product – a series

I’ve decided to give you guys an up-close-and-personal look into how I’ve gotten started making my first e-book.

1. Find an audience that’s yours

For a product to have any traction, you have to take the initiative to find a crowd that’s interested in your type of art. After that, all you have to do is make some commotion. Make yourself known, state a clear purpose, and be original.

Not many people do this online. Take this to heart and you’ll be able to differentiate yourself from the fakes and become a true linchpin – someone indispensable.

2. Research on material related to your niche

An artist’s inspiration does not come from only looking over his old works, but also from taking bits of wisdom from other artists. But isn’t that stealing?

Actually, it isn’t. Whatever has been said in the past is being regurgitated right in front of you. What separates new works of art from classics is how the modern artist integrates his perspective into what’s already been done.

3. Be ruthless with what you create

Revise, refresh, repaint, resurface, recreate, whatever; do what you have to do to put out your best work. What you’ve giving away for free has merely been the appetizer. This time, for your very first work, pull out all the stops.

It’s taken weeks for me to try and make what this e-book says worth remembering… and I’m still not completely finished.

This is how all great art is made. Constant revision and critique until it’s as good as it can get. It’ll never be perfect, but putting in your best effort will make it worth it.

To be continued in part 2…

Creative Commons License photo credit: Marco Arment

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June 28, 2010

Be Your Best Self

Have you ever heard the phrase, “It’s not enough just to be yourself. You have to be your BEST self”?

If not, then I’m almost certain that you’re not taking this most important action everyday.

To be your best self is to put everything you have into making each and every day meaningful to you. It is to be your ideal self.

Being your best self, of course, is easier said than done. Most of us can’t live up to our ideals; they’re just locked too deep from within as the result of insecurity, peer pressure, and self-consciousness.

Others, instead, will push past this resistance to embrace freedom and the power of choice.

Do what you want to do, not what you feel you must do

I’ve lived as a servant before, only doing things others would tell me to because these things were acceptable to a number of people vastly greater than myself. During this time, I wasn’t being myself, let alone my best.

I was simply going through the motions, without direction nor a purpose. And if you’re missing either of those, consider yourself a slave to whomever decides to act on you first. I followed orders quite well, almost to a T, never trying to make myself noticeable or different.

I’m living now as myself. I strive everyday to live as my BEST self. A self that no one can merely tell what to do. A self that only I control. A self that does work which truly matters, not busy automation that a robot can do.

I enjoy going where no person has gone before. Challenging our not, if a new path is open and seems interesting enough, I have no choice but to pursue it.

As a hedonist, I survive only for pleasure. While pain may occasionally show itself in the form of failure, love lost, struggle, etc. I understand that it will one day pass. And when it does pass, it is my choice whether or not to embrace pleasure again or whether I want to remain covered in depression and pity.

Find out who you are and express it

You must determine what kind of person you are or what type of individual you wish to exist as. Once you discover that, it is imperative that you immediately portray it.

Think of yourself as an actor in an award-winning motion picture. This picture is called “Your Life”. Who do you want to be when the movie plays?

What does your character do? Is he a boring math teacher who goes strictly by the book and never strays into the realm of creativity, or is he the type of teacher that teaches the way he wants to teach, not only teaches his students but inspires his students, and is fondly remembered long after class ends?

How does your character act? Is he irrationally, overemotional, and reactive? Does he have low self-esteem and believe himself to have little self-worth?

Or is he cool, calm, and calculating? Does he radiate irrational self-confidence and exude a certainty of excellence that this world has never seen?

You alone decide who your best self can and will become.

Nevertheless, it’s not enough that you want to be somebody else or want to live like somebody else. If you don’t start acting like your ideal self, you never will be.

Creative Commons License photo credit: Aleera*

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June 3, 2010

One Quick Tip to Transform Your Interactions Right Now

Stop being reactive.

I’ve been experimenting with this tip when engaging in conversation to great success recently. Matters that would usually set off my “ignoramus-alarm” and cause me to shout, yell, and basically go ballistic, have fallen prey to my being non-reactive.

There are only three steps you have to follow if you want to be completely non-reactive:

1. Pause before you answer anything

Briefly take a moment to assess the situation you may be presented with. There’s some sort of unspoken rule in society that says you have to answer any question someone asks you with speed and efficiency. This actually isn’t necessary.

Stop trying to accomodate who you’re having a conversation with (thinking thoughts like, “If I don’t answer fast enough, they’ll think I’m stupid, being rude, etc.) and slow down.

2. Detach your emotions

You have the right to take yourself out of any pointless discussion, heated argument, or unnecessary quarrel you may accidentally get cajoled into. When emotions get involved, tensions can rise and feelings are hurt. Stay in control of your emotions — let the other people crash and storm around you while you remain as stable as a rock.

3. Keep the “next” attitude on the brain

It doesn’t matter if you say something stupid, rude, or incoherent. In the end, you always get another chance at conversation, so why sweat the small stuff? A mispronounced word during a presentation, an accidental slip of a million-dollar word, even a simple fumbling of your speech into a stutter; it’s not as big a deal as you think.

It’s important to be careful with your words, but if you happen to mess up, move on from it. There’s no point obsessing over miscommunication. Promptly correct your accidents and proceed.

Try this tip today and tell me how it works out for you.

“A man who is master of himself can end a sorrow as easily as he can invent a pleasure. I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.” – Oscar Wilde

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June 1, 2010

Interview With Leo Babauta: Inside an Inspirational Minimalist

It’s been quite a while since I’ve had an interview with a remarkable online creator, so I’m very happy to welcome to the blog, best-selling author and minimalist blogger, Leo Babauta!

This interview has been a really great experience, because Leo’s first blog, Zen Habits, was one of the very first blogs that got me into personal development and simplicity. I’ve learned a lot from what he’s discussed here as well as what else Leo teaches on his many blogs.

Just so you can get a better picture of who Leo really is, I’ve stolen, augmented, and updated a bit of his info from his about page (I’m sure he wouldn’t mind):

  • Created Zen Habits and made it a top blog within a year. Today, Zen Habits has over 175K subscribers and was named one of the Top 25 blogs by Time Magazine.
  • Started a second blog, Write To Done, for writers and bloggers. It now has more than 16K subscribers and is one of the Top 10 blogs for writers.
  • Wrote the No. 1 best-selling productivity ebook, Zen To Done. Has been bought and downloaded by tens of thousands of readers.
  • Wrote a best-selling print book, The Power of Less. The book made the best-selling list on Amazon.com, and is in bookstores around the country.
  • Made a third blog, mnmlist, about minimalism. Has well over 6,000 subscribers already.

His teachings of doing more with less have started a movement across the blogosphere, resulting in a bevy of individuals becoming minimalists, freeing themselves from being overwhelmed by stuff and engaging in more meaningful experiences.

Right before his big move this summer to San Francisco, Leo shares his thoughts:

———————————-

John: Your teachings of simplicity and minimalism have spread far and wide across the personal development blogosphere. I just have to ask, how are you applying these teachings to your personal life? Do you try and get your wife and kids to follow them as well?

Leo: I’m applying them slowly, and thoughtfully. I don’t believe in drastic overhauls of my life — I do things a little at a time, and see how I like them. I reflect on the changes, and blog about them. Mmlist.com and Zen Habits are basically reflections on slow changes I’m making.

My kids and wife aren’t as minimalist as I am, nor do I try to force them to be. But I think my example gives them ideas and inspiration, and of course they give me ideas and inspiration as well! My wife amazes me — she’s become a homeschooling mom, given up most of her possessions (I think she’s down to 120 personal things), is running and eating healthier, and in general is as happy as ever!

John: Very nice. I totally agree that you should implement changes slowly, one habit at a time. I remember reading about your technique in an article that talked about mastering one habit a month. Have you been doing any experimenting lately (testing new “zen habits”)? If so, any examples you care to share?

Leo: Lately, I’ve been less focused on forming new habits than on reshaping previous ones. So while I have a fairly healthy eating habit, I’ve been making small changes — eating more real foods such as fruits and raw nuts as snacks, for example. My writing habits are constantly seeking new ground, trying to find a better groove without abandoning the good parts of the old groove. I’ve also been looking for a balance between long-form online reading and novel reading, two of my favorite forms of reading.

That said, lately, I’ve been doing short (5-minute) zen meditation sessions with my wife most mornings, and have really enjoyed that. It’s a beautiful way to start the day.

John: Any new projects/products that you’re working on? Anything on the horizon?

Leo: I’ve recently given up ads on Zen Habits, and am looking at other ways to support my family. Digital products and courses that I make myself are probably the way I’ll go. I was considering premium subscriptions for $5 and $10 — people could still subscribe to Zen Habits for free, but for a premium subscription they’d get additional content podcasts, and live webinars. But now I’m thinking of doing twice-monthly courses, where I teach people to do things I’ve learned to do. We’ll see!

John: What’s one of the craziest things you’ve always wanted to do that you’ve done since you’ve become self-employed?

Leo: Picking up and moving my family to San Francisco is pretty crazy, for me at least. We’re leaving behind our old life, our beloved family and friends, and starting from scratch. We don’t even know where we’ll live exactly, nor will we each have anything but a backpack full of clothing. Exiciting!

John: Who has inspired you? Any individuals you’ve just found out about?

Leo: Oh man, where to start? I’m inspired by so many people, there’s no way to mention them all. I currently love:

And many more!

John: Where do you see yourself down the line? Maybe in five years?

Leo: I have no idea — I just hope I continue doing thing I love. I’ve given up trying to plan or predict the future, and just focus on what I’m doing right now. If I do things I’m passionate about, and do my utmost, it’s amazing what often emerges — unexpected, wonderful, surprising things.

John: If you could give one very last piece of advice, what would it be?

Leo: It doesn’t sound like much, but Thich Nhat Hanh’s “Smile, breathe, and go slowly” is profoundly life-changing. Each one of those things can transform your life, and the more I explore them, the deeper this advice becomes.

John: Sounds great, Leo. Thank you so much for your time.

–

Leo has been such an inspiration and it’s been a pleasure having him share what he knows. If you want to get a deeper look into what minimalism is, I recommend you check out his book, The Power of Less, grab his e-book, the Simple Guide to a Minimalist Life, or visit mnmlist.com.

Don’t forget to follow Leo on Twitter.

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May 24, 2010

75 Life-Changing Truths Written While Lying on the Grass

Wrote most of these Saturday evening while (as the title already tells you) lying on the grass outside. They were compiled to get myself out of boredom and now I feel inspired again.

Enjoy!

1. Whenever you focus heavily on an outcome, you rarely ever get it

2. Ultimately, nobody really does care about you more than yourself

3. People love children more than adults because they’re so unpredictable (in other words, act like an adult, but live as a child)

4. It’s very hard for people to follow others’ advice, even more so their own

5. A mountain’s worth of effort will get you anything you want

6. Laying on the grass isn’t as bad as I thought it would be – it’s actually quite freeing

7. What people may think of you matters nothing compared to what you think of yourself

8. The stuff that people try to distract you with (their words, their praise, their criticism) – that is noise. Filter that out and find the true meaning within

9. Complaining alters nothing (or at the very most, alters very little). For maximum impact, physically do something about it

10. I’ve found that people don’t like hearing the truth. That’s why I have this blog. This way I won’t have to argue, plead, or shout to be heard. All I have to do is type

11. Television, movies, books, even blogs – they serve as an escape from reality. But that doesn’t mean you can’t take lessons from them to change your own reality

12. I’m almost certain that I would be happier as an animal than as a human. At least I’d actually live everyday as if it was my last

13. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with sex. Just be smart enough to know when and how to do it

14. Sometimes, you just need a break from your normal social circle. I’m lying in the grass instead of going to the movies. What are you doing?

15. If I can make $200 doing what I love (writing on this blog) then so can you doing what you love. Just prepare to work your ass off

16. You really don’t need as much as you think you do

17. Minimalism does not mean to be happy having absolutely nothing. It means being content with having manageable amounts of stuff

18. Placating others for them to like you is low-class behavior

19. I could’ve chosen to be miserable and bored, but instead I’ve decided to make myself happy and write. Are you listening? You can change how you feel in an instant

20. Don’t seek a reaction from other people. Do what you want because YOU want to

21. How can you [blank] another if you can’t even [same word] yourself? Nearly any verb will do

22. Appreciate all music. It is created from the raw emotion of a composer

23. School is only fun from grades Pre-K through 2nd grade. From then on, you have to start breaking the rules to keep from being bored

24. Learning isn’t really that much fun. It’s just interesting. Applying knowledge > witnessing someone else apply knowledge > reading/learning about it

25. The greatest pleasures in life are requited love and doing what you love

26. I used to get scabs all the time. They were the battle scars gained as children waging the war on boredom through play

27. Stories matter

28. Focus on the ‘why’ rather than on the ‘what’. Life instantly becomes more meaningful

29. Don’t let inspiration go to waste. Act on it, just as I’m doing right now

30. College focuses too much on memorization and grades than on what you actually learn to internalize

31. The teachers who have inspired me are the ones who I remember the most

32. Accept the fact that you can’t be the best at everything

33. Science rules the world. Even emotion (although metaphysical) is based in science

34. All emotions are contagious – enthusiasm, depression, anger, you name it

35. White lies are better than regular lies; at least you’re acknowledging the truth rather than completely disregarding it

36. Ignorance is truly bliss. Didn’t even know what racism was until I learned about it in school

37. Farting in public will always be hilarious, no matter how old I get

38. Sometimes it’s better to be a jerk than to be a nice guy

39. The happiest people are the ones who get paid for doing what they love instead of what they like or what they don’t really care much for

40. Everyone is judgmental. Deal with it. You cannot deny human nature

41. Cool, calm, and collected; that’s how you carry on business

42. Certain people will always try and find a way to show your success in a negative light

43. Where are your balls? The opportunities are right in front of you. Take them

44. Why do people keep on living when death would be so much easier? Because life is fleeting and death is forever

45. Doubt really sucks. It serves no purpose other than to keep you from trying something new (okay, and maybe keeping you from getting yourself killed, but still)

46. Public speaking is only scary when you don’t know what you’re talking about

47. Having superpowers wouldn’t make life that much easier. You’d just have a lot more crap to deal with

48. With great power comes a lot of people asking you for help

49. Men and women are actually not that hard to figure out, as opposed to popular belief

50. No lock is impenetrable. You just need to find the right key (never said it would be easy to find though)

51. If religion just feels like an extra set of rules to follow, don’t practice it

52. In fact, if a certain action is more trouble than it’s worth, cease and desist

53. You can’t choose who or what you’re attracted to. It’s a DNA thing

54. Being a skeptic of a traditionally-held idea is positively exhilarating

55. Push your creativity to the breaking point. Your best ideas will be just beyond it

56. Your reaction to a situation is more important than the situation itself

57. To be able to change your life, you have to be bold

58. The world does not reward those who expect things or feel entitled to outcomes

59. There is no point in fearing the things that cannot possibly kill you

60. Nobody knows what you’re thinking until you tell them (or show them)

61. People try new things (good and bad) because they’re bored

62. Your thoughts come through in your body language; if you’re confident, you stand tall or lean back. If you’ve got low self-esteem you slouch and flinch easily

63. It’s not worth it traveling to other countries if you’re just going to sight see. Actually, “live” inside another country

64. Hesitation, fear, and excuse-making are the things that keep the “right time” from happening

65. Without respect, no relationship can prevail

66. Boredom is death within life

67. Everything starts in the enigmatic properties of your mind. Your perception is everything

68. You cannot be completely neutral in this world. Pick a side on your own before peer pressure forces you to

69. Express yourself any way you can: laughing, living, writing, loving, drawing, blogging, singing, working, cooking, building… the list goes on and on

70. People will remember you for what you did more than what you said

71. There’s a reason everyone harps on aging; youth is the only span of time when your stamina, body, and mind are at their highest performance

72. Your problems are not unique. Somebody on this planet is sharing the same pain you are

73. On the flip side, with regards to #72, you could also say the same for accomplishments and joy

74. You think you are any different from the people that inspire others? You too have the ability to inspire

75. Everyone has gifts. It’s up to them to find the value in their own abilities, to find the light underneath their dark, to find the blessing within their curse

Creative Commons License photo credit: Gibson Claire McGuire Regester

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May 13, 2010

On Being Indispensable

The only thing that will ensure you will live a sustainable lifestyle for the rest of your existence on Earth is becoming valuably indispensable.

Now, what does it mean to be valuably indispensable?

You must have value – as in, be worth something.

You must be indispensable – as in, you must be someone who is so valuable, it literally be an act of stupidity not to hire you or not to recommend you.

Two paths – one choice

In this world, there are two types of workers. The first type is the typical worker bee of an employee. He seeks to please the boss in the hopes of someday getting to be the boss. He would nearly go as far as considering jumping off of a bridge to get a gold star from the guy upstairs.

When the boss says jump, this guy asks how high.

When the boss says do this project or file that document, he does it in record time.

When the boss tells this guy to do what he thinks is best, the worker bee can only panic.

He can only muster, “Aren’t you supposed to tell me what to do?” while the boss barks back, “Figure it out! What do you think I hired you for?”

This is the plight of the worker bee.

The second type of worker is extremely rare. We’ll came him the valuable artist.

An individual of vast creativity and knowledgeable experience, this guy is, in retrospect, nothing aesthetically special. He has no denoting characteristics that make him look any different than the common worker bee. He may not be as fashionable, not as outgoing, or maybe not even as good-looking.

But you’ll know who he is once you look him in the eye while he works.

When he shifts into overdrive, this person becomes unstoppable; a force to be reckoned with. Watch the worker bee work and witness the valuable artist create. The difference is prodigious.

The worker bee will do everything diligently and efficiently, step by step, never straying even one hair from the lines. He’ll sometimes get the urge to do something his way, but you’ll never catch him taking that chance. His job, no, his life is on the line.

He tells his inner artist to wait until another day.

The valuable artist, however, will be sure to not disappoint. He asks not for guidelines, for he needs only one: to create the best work of art possible. He rises above and beyond the call of duty of any task put in front of him. He doesn’t merely produce work, but he also strives to innovate.

Each and everyday is a chance for him to do something amazing.

Of course, the valuable artist is not well-liked. A lot of people, in fact, live to despise him. You can hear the cries throughout the office walls: “Why is hasn’t he been fired yet!? That’s not what the boss wanted! Why does the boss like him so much? He’s too unorthodox!”

“Teacher’s pet.”

But he cannot hear them. The only thoughts that are taking over his mind are the thousands of ideas that he wants to try, wants to test, wants to experiment with!

This is the marvelous existence of the valuable artist.

The tipping point

But one day there will come a time where everything will change for both the worker bee and the valuable artist employees.

This day will change their lives forever.

On this day, the boss will call them both to his office. He will ask the worker bee to come in first. Happy to do anything for the boss, he will oblige. He sits down, eagerly awaiting the good news of a promotion or a massive pay raise.

The boss will give a speech detailing how valuable the worker bee has been to the company. And at the end of the seemingly never-ending conversation, the boss will say the faithful words, “I’m sorry Worker Bee. I have to let you go.”

The worker bee storms out, unable to even look his once honorable master in the eye. Without the direction of a boss, what can he hope to accomplish? He decides to think on it for some time…

After the worker bee leaves the building, the valuable artist is called in. The boss asks him to sit down. The valuable artist sits, ready for anything the boss can bring. He already knows his answer.

“Do you know why you’re here?” the boss asks.

“Yes… it is because you want to fire me”, replies the creator.

“…Actually, no. I want to keep you. You are one of the ones I need to keep this company afloat. I can’t possibly let you go.”

Our artist is unmoved. He replies, “Thank you, sir. I thank you for allowing me to stay with the company for this long. Now I know that I can do good work…. but I’m afraid I can’t allow myself to stay.”

The boss quickly becomes flustered and baffled. “Wh- What did you say? I need you here on this team.”

“You’ve given me many great opportunities, sir, but I cannot allow myself to work under you any longer. My creativity means more than the world to me. I feel that I can do so much more remarkable things… on my own”, says the artist.

A meaningful silence befalls them both. For a moment, they look each other in the eyes. For just a moment, the boss sees himself in the eyes of the valuable artist. The eyes that have hidden a desire to grow… that has just now been released.

“I…understand”, says the boss.

“Good luck, sir. And thank you.”

The valuable artist steps out into the world, his canvas, unsure if he made the right decision. But in the end, it matters not. The months ahead will not be easy, but rest assured he knows his path, his passion, his end.

He cannot fail. Or, better yet, he won’t allow it.

–inspired by Seth Godin’s interview at Brazen Careerist

Creative Commons License photo credit: prosto photos

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The True Meaning of Passion

I figure I could be doing more than just writing about what I know. A lot of other web artists have learned amazing life lessons, so why not hand over the spotlight to them for a bit?

That’s why, today, I’m highlighting a 28-year-old artist who goes by the name of Monty Oum. If you take a look at his work, you just know that he’s passionate about what he does. For over six years, he’s been making CGI animation videos, slowly rising to become a prominent computer graphics artist within the videogame industry. I myself discovered him just two years ago, and I love his stuff.

A few months back, I stumbled upon a very intriguing blog post of his that I think you guys will find valuable. I hope you can pick out the nuggets of gold in his wise words:

Words to Live By

“I continually hope that someday I’ll get a chance to pass on everything I’ve learned. There hardly seems a moment considering living by my words only means having absolutely no time to say them. So at least I can take a moment in slight to utter in passing.

Never let anyone tell you that something is impossible.

I lived by that when it sparked in me the possibility of achieving something despite everyone telling me it being impossible otherwise. People have always told me it’s impossible, that it’s been tried. If you know what I’m talking about then your already on your way. What I will say to you ignore those who’ve been defeated by what they call “experience.” Keep going and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

I know this might sound familiar even, never give up etc. But it’s how I live my life even currently as there still are more “experienced” people who will criticize that I’m doing it wrong. It’s the human spirit that’ll keep us alive. This rings true to the events of my life, when I started Haloid. I didn’t do it because I wanted to get a job in games, or that I wanted to become famous, or what have you. I did it because I knew it could be done, and that the road to finishing it was imperfect and difficult. What finishing it yielded me was only more steps on the path to pushing forward in what I believed in.

My life lacks much, I’m broke, my car is in horrible shape, my apartment is a mess, I spend 3 days in a row at the office regularly and sleep on the couch only when I need to. I’m helplessly antisocial. I see my girlfriend 3 times a year.

I come from an impoverished family of Cambodian civil war refugees. It been a long journey between being so incredibly poor that I didn’t have paper to draw on when I was little, to where I am now. It wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t dive headfirst and take a risk, and continually risk it all to keep going forward… Heh, success? They thought it was impossible.

What is the greatest reward for living in such difficulty?..

I hope you see it someday too, Cause the world looks very different, when you’re pushing yourself every second you’ve got.”

- Monty Oum

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Here’s some of his art in motion. Keep in mind, he created the entire video himself. He is remarkable in every sense of the word.

(Warning! You must be 13 years or older to watch – normally I don’t advocate random, bloodless violence, but this is art):

Watch it here if you’re interested.

Creative Commons License photo credit: Letcombe

Have you yourself been living passionately, pushing yourself every second you’ve got towards what you enjoy doing? Discuss.

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April 22, 2010

Why There’s Nothing Wrong With Trying Something New

Your parents were probably the first people ever to tell you to try.

While you were laying down flat on the floor, content with crawling around on a pair of arms and knees, your parents were the ones who coaxed you to walk. For a time, you just stared at them like a deer in the headlights.

Eventually you gave in to their attempts to stand you up on two legs and robotically move your  feet; you decided to try.

No doubt you were clumsy at first — your first attempts usually ended with bonking your head on the living room table or falling on your diaper-wearing butt. Puzzlement ensued nonetheless.

You probably just couldn’t get why it was so hard — you’ve seen how babies act after their first couple tries — they just revert back to crawling. But one thing you’ll notice is that after those depressing attempts they’ll watch you walk and even try standing without you coming to their aid.

For some reason, after trying, you seemed to want to walk. You tried it before, it wasn’t so bad, but now you wanted to perfect it. The cycle generally continued in this manner:

You wobble to your feet. You stand tall. You take a step and fall.

You wobble some more. You stand tall. You take a few more steps and boom.

You master the art of standing. You take a few steps and actually walk… until another table seems to come out of nowhere.

Then one day, your movements become automatic. You stand up. You stand tall. You walk. And you never crawl again… okay maybe you do sometimes.

This is not a post about babies – my point

We have been encouraged to try new things since the early days of our lives. Everyone has had firsts: first walk, first friend, first piece of candy, first day of school, college, work, etc.

But for some reason, when we reach a certain age, trying becomes something to be looked down upon. In our young years of adulthood, the act of trying new things become synonymous with the act of being weird. Or being stupid. Or being “a deluded dreamer”. These days, you can’t suggest anything resembling a pipe dream unless you want to be criticized.

Since when is it a bad thing to want to try things out of the ordinary? I’m well aware that using walking to support my point isn’t the best example. But why do the things we want to do have to have already been done by everybody else in order for us to do it?

I’ll tell you why. Because somewhere along the line of our existence, we’ve become afraid to try. The curiosity we used to have as children has become rationalized into fear. We’ve come from thinking,

“Hmm, I wonder what will happen if I do this?”

to

“Holy crap! There’s no way in hell I’m doing that! What if (insert wimpy excuse here).”

It doesn’t make sense not to try

I understand there are evolutionary reasons for this. We shouldn’t jump off a bridge to see for ourselves if we can fly. And it probably isn’t a the best idea to try and mimic what you see on TV. I mean, you don’t want to get seriously injured, right?

But that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try things that might prove exciting for you. How about just one day deciding to go to Brazil for no reason other than to see what happens? How about talking to that one girl you’re probably never talk to if you don’t try?

How about taking a chance and hoping for the best?

Because honestly, there is no downside. There may be some collateral damage (anything from a bruised ego to some broken bones, depending on what you try — I do not advocate life-threatening stunts), but the results are well worth it.

The way I see it, you can gain:

1. A new life lesson

2. A good story to share

Go out there and take a chance

You only have one life. Everybody knows this and we still act like it’s a lie. What are you waiting on and saving for the future? Why are you drawing up plans for something so simple? When will that “maybe later” turn into “let’s do it right now”?

Become an advocate of living life like it is your last. It honestly does make a difference. Even now, I’m spending my night writing for all of you. Is my life exciting? When I’m writing, you bet it is. Can it get more exciting? Come along for the ride (i.e. subscribe to this blog), and you’ll find out.

Here’s my permission: I’m telling you to try. Keep trying new things until your life runs well out; because that’s what we should be doing, each and every day.
Creative Commons License photo credit: fdecomite

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